ON OUR FACES- an ongoing worship discussion

From our Garden

2006-08-19T19:42:00.000-05:00

The tree in our front yard has been loaded with pink blossoms all summer long scattering a light pink carpet all over our lawn.

Where the Wild Flowers Grow

2006-08-19T19:39:00.000-05:00

We sowed wild flower seeds and have enjoyed the varieties that have popped up all summer long.

One of our flower pots

2006-08-19T19:36:00.000-05:00

This sits on the walk up to our court-yard gate, one of the gifts the girls gave me for Mother's Day.

Where Wild Flowers Grow

2006-08-19T19:25:00.000-05:00

Black-eyed Susan.

What the Heck is the Emerging Church anway?

2006-06-22T16:04:00.000-05:00

by Jessica

I've pasted below what originally started out as a comment I was making on a friends blog after reading his review of D.A. Carson's Becoming Conversant with the Emerging Church. It got a little long (ya think!) so I decided not to post it there and put it here instead. Let me know your thoughts.

hmmmm, Kevin, sounds interesting and I may have to give it a read. Not having read it so commenting really only on your comments about the book there are a few things that give me pause. I would have to argue that Carson's view that the emerging church absolutely rejects modernity and has taken a position of absolute embrace of postmodernity is a major misinterpretation of the conversations from the leadership of emerging churches. It's so strange to me that I've heard this before (McArthur and others have shared similar critiques) and yet find my self sitting here scratching my head and saying, "Where? I just don't see it." Maybe it's because I find myself thinking a bit more like a postmodern but all I really see is a group of people questioning and wrestling with the meaning behind some of the status quo practices of the church not a rejection of all things modern. As it is, rejecting modernity should not be the same thing as rejecting the church or even a complete embrace of postmodernity. By the very questions and willingness to dialog about such issues (including theology, doctrine, and a social gospel) the emerging church has not moved into a position of absolute embracing of postmodernity, if it had the conversation would have stopped already and a new dogma would be in place. Sure, there may be emerging churches that are doing just that but as a whole I would question that critiques application. I do agree however that once a critic makes up their mind that an issue as fundamental as this is so flawed and closed for discussion they will then miss the positive practices and reforms that come from questioning the status quo.

That said I do believe the church needs to accept postmodernity as the common worldview today. As with modernity the church needs to find ways to communicate with a culture that has a different worldview than that of Scripture. When emerging leaders speak of rejecting modernity it is usually in the context of realizing that modernity is no longer the commonly held worldview of today's society and the church shouldn't feel threatened by this because modernity does not and never has equaled true Christianity.

I agree with Carson’s and your concerns about how emerging church leaders seem to portray the modernity and evangelicalism in an absolutist and controlling way, attempting to reduce and dismiss the churches impact at times. How ever, sadly, there are times in the history of the Christian Church that give evidence to such arguments. Personally I don’t feel that tactic is productive or edifying at all (I have the same issue with those that are attacking the emerging church) but comes from a place of bitterness and hurt and maybe even fear of being misunderstood or dismissed. What really needs to happen here is healing and reconciliation. For some, even if they can’t argue this with historical backing what they do have is personal experience and that is worth more than any amount of proof. If someone feels as though they have been treated such by the church then this is the reality of the modern church for them. It is with these people that the emerging church can reach in ways the modern church cannot. You mention that a side effect of this has been a questioning of the historic faith itself. I wonder if this is a bad thing? First of all, people have been questioning the faith since the faith began and will continue to do so. In Scripture we are encouraged to taste and see that the Lord is good, the mode with which that is done today is by questioning. Secondly, we don’t want to encourage a faith that is accepted without a personal investment that leads to conviction and ownership. The individual that really knows from a personal conviction what they are living for because they have tested and tried it will have a much firmer faith than one that felt they could never question and therefore never come to a personal understanding that would be in evidenced by a life lived with conviction. And third, doesn’t it seem appropriate that an invitation to question our historic faith is issued by Christ’s church? Everyone else is telling the world to question the historic faith, atheists, teachers, deists, etc. If the church is the one place where such journeying is not encouraged it will also be the one place where such answers are never found.

Again, I haven’t read Carson’s book so this is my response to your response. Hope it makes some sense. The emerging church is not just one thing. I continue to pray that the emerging church will cease to define itself by what it is not but will soon find a way to articulate what it is. Better yet, I hope the conversations and dialog continue but we stay away from arrogant answers and remain authentic and open with the journey.

I’m glad to hear you are exploring this but I’d like to encourage you to interact and dialog with those that are a part of the emerging church, you’ll find all types and we don’t all agree. Still, you will get a better feel and understanding of what God is doing in this small segment of his church by participating in the dialog instead of reading about it. Just my two cents. Anyone else?

Balloon Fiesta

2006-04-23T22:35:00.000-05:00

Thanks Laura!

Brilliant, just brilliant

2006-04-23T21:54:00.001-05:00

This is as sad as it is hilarious.

".... because Jesus is like pot; cuz before you do it, you think it's stupid... but then once you light up a j you realize it's pretty rad. "

Has to be the single most convincing argument I've ever heard for why someone would want to know Jesus. I would tell you where I found the brilliant quote above but I'm afraid that you would think I'm godless. The pictures are just for fun, after all, I'm posting on the weekend, nothing too deep.

In the midst of Chaos

2006-04-18T21:19:00.000-05:00

"It's so great to see you're comfortable in the midst of the chaos" my student commented as he was standing at our front door about to leave.

I took a moment and looked around, the house was a mess, of course, but it was actually quiet as Jeremy had just gotten the girls to bed so it hardly seemed chaotic to me. Sure, the table is half covered in craft projects and miscellaneous stuff, the side table is covered in a lovely exotic looking throw with a framed print of the Eiffel Tower on it but has a stack of photos all over it hiding the Eiffel Tower picture; the desk- actually, you can see parts of the desk; the coffee table has games, beads, clothes, papers and a box of crayons on it; the couch has an Easter hat, a pair of shoes and a couple of books; all the pillows are on the floor as "jumping cushions;" the arm chair has foam number stickers stuck all over it and you know if you sat down you'd stand up with various variables all over your rear; there is an odd unidentified sticky substance all over the floor by the door; a jumbled mess of shoes protrudes from under the bench by the front door that is loaded with a random collection of items to be either returned or kept and stored some place safe and pieces of Tae Kwon Do uniforms. But still, this hardly seems chaotic to me.

"Well..." was the only intelligent thing I could think of to say.

"No really, you let people into your home when it is a disaster area and it doesn't seem to phase you. My wife would be freaking out. Its just nice to see you've come to terms with the chaos" he says with a warm and comforting smile, his tone touched with something that could either be awe, pity, or bewilderment.

I choke back a snort and smile sweetly.

"I just pick my battles, what's really important to me. The girls are my priority, not a clean house and nice things. I'll clean up when the kids are gone and buy nice furniture then."

"See, that's what I mean. I think that's great. My ex would never have stood for that."

We chat a little more as I walk him out and remind him of what we had worked on that evening.

I didn't bother to tell him that I'm hoping to have learned how to really keep a clean house by the time the girls are gone because when they leave I will have run out of excuses!

When "Uplifting" lets you down

2006-04-17T11:21:00.000-05:00

by Jessica Martin-Weber

"We need to be relevant." I hear that a lot when I meet with pastors, youth pastors, and some church leaders. It usually comes from those advocating change in a transitioning church and I've found that it usually means "uplifting contemporary worship." But in their quest to be "relevant" in how they worship and share the gospel many church leaders loose touch with the culture of their congregation as well as the culture they are trying to reach and as a result somehow end up "irrelevant" in a new style.

“Happy, clappy music” and SNL style dramas don’t make a church relevant, nor do small groups. I’m not saying they’re bad (though the music and dramas are certainly not my style) but that it’s more than the programs and worship style that connects people with Christ. Though the term “authentic” is over-used when it comes to talking about worship these days, true authenticity seems to be lacking in most of our churches. When I asked a friend of mine what would make a church relevant to him he said “honesty.” A place where pretence is set aside and we can be who we are without having to have all the answers. A place where we can share honestly about Scripture, relationships, serving, and life’s struggles as well as express praise and celebration. Such a place would be more relevant than all the video clips, small group book discussions, and trendy music you could find. Community is a beautiful thing but community that neglects the harder side of life isn’t really a community, it’s a country club. Constantly being “up” can be tough to live up to and not at all what we see in the struggles found in Scripture. Sure, there are groups that are willing to discuss some of life’s struggles (usually men’s groups and women’s groups) but we don’t usually find this happening in our worship gatherings, at least not outside of the occasional sermon that is willing to wrestle with “the dark side.” Most leaders understand that praise and worship isn’t based on our feelings, but somehow we have managed to communicate just the opposite by only planning high energy praise portions in our services that express constant “up” feelings as in some unnatural high followed by mellow Jesus love songs the have no problem with feigning intimacy without embracing the tension of hurt unsettled that is actually a part of such relationships. I have no doubt that some people really don’t want to deal with the part of themselves that is a "downer” and leaders want worshipers to leave “uplifted” but nowhere do we see in Scripture where denial is accepted (think David, Bathsheba and Nathanial) but growth, with all it’s painful qualities, is embraced and encouraged.

Is relevancy even something we should be seeking? I question the importance of being relevant because I'm struck by the timelessness of the Gospel. Often we hope that we will be relevant by using what are really languages of the culture and certainly these tools help in communicating the Gospel but they don't make us relevant. True relevancy comes from honest living, honest teaching, honest questions and honest worship. We don’t have to do anything to make the message we share relevant, God has already done that. The most we can hope for is to live the Gospel with relevance in our own lives, through the highs and the lows.

Worship Leader and The Lead Pastor

2006-03-16T18:03:00.000-06:00

by Jessica Martin-Weber

I can't tell you the number of times I've heard worship leader friends, myself, and at one point, even my own father voiced this frustration: "I feel so unappreciated as an artist by my lead pastor."

What's up with that? Is it because the artist tends to be insecure and overly sensitive? Or maybe it's that the lead pastor is taking them for granted? Perhaps it's just a difference in temperaments and personality types? Of course, it could be the difficulty in balancing art and administration? And what about gifting, priorities, and calling? Are jealousy and arrogance possibly part of the problem?

I think it may have to do with all of those reasons and then some but what are your thoughts? What kind of experience have you had as a worship leader/worship artist or as pastor? Have you had a relationship with a lead pastor where you felt encouraged or discouraged as an artist? Pastors, what about you in working with a worship leader? Both lead pastors and worship leaders, what do you think is the problem here and what are possible solutions.

Pastors, what is one thing you'd love to hear or see from your worship leader? And Worship leaders, what is one thing you'd love to hear or see from your lead pastor?

What Would You Say? Part 2

2006-02-22T16:37:00.000-06:00

by Jessica

This is a post that is also on our family blog... where the conversation originally started. Actually, I'm not sure it is a conversation since there hasn't been much comented but still, I'd like to hear what other people have to say. Go to

our family blog to see how the conversation started.

Anonymous, I started replying to your comment twice but life kept happening... sorry about that.

I think this is an interesting question but one I don't think I really have an answer for because I don't believe that I can convince anyone to turn to Christ at least, not with words. The truth is, cliché though it may be, talk is cheap. I certainly believe that people can and are motivated through the written (and spoken) word and God uses a variety of tools to draw people to Him but I don’t believe it’s my job to convince anyone to believe anything but rather what the Spirit does in a person that draws them to Christ. The dangers that surround trying to convince someone to turn to Christ is that our tone can easily become arrogant and condescending, lacking in love and who wants that?

My desire would be to have a relationship with this person if it was someone I could have a relationship with- which would of course require more contact than one post could facilitate. But here’s the thing, I reject the idea of “friendship evangelism” even after all my years of being indoctrinated with this method of evangelism. If I began a relationship with this person there would be something other than me wanting to convince them of anything, we would have to share life on some level. My faith would never be a secret, but I wouldn’t be trying to manipulate conversations to not-so-subtly point out how they need God. I would seek to be in genuine relationship with this person, no hidden agenda.

If, hypothetically speaking, I could only make one post to this person and not knowing the context of the post or how I even came to this person’s blog, I would do my best to avoid clichés and “preaching” and instead try to be open to them and not act like I have all the answers (because I certainly don’t), speaking with love and genuine concern. As for anything beyond hoping to develop a relationship, I’ll leave that to God.

Smoking Cigar

2006-02-20T15:39:00.000-06:00

I found this picture today on a friends photoblog. I had forgotten all about this, taken about 6 months ago at Bill's b-day party. It wasn't the greatest cigar but it wasn't too bad- it was my friends birthday cigar and he shared with me. Nothing like a cigar on a hot, humid, Houston night! The picture just makes me laugh.

Sigh

2006-02-14T10:26:00.000-06:00

by Jessica

WORSHIP IS NOT MUSIC! Why does this drive me crazy? I sat in a meeting once leading a group in a discussion of the essentials of worship based on Scripture and we spent about 30 minutes debating why music is not an essential of worship but rather a tool and one of many at that. Often I hear a worship gathering (even more often a church) described primarily by it's musical style rather than the content and each time I'm struggle to pay attention to the speaker because I'm arguing in my head with the person that the musical style doesn't define any church or worship gathering as it's just one small piece of the pie. *Sigh* Worship is not music. End rant... for now.

On our family blog was recently asked how I would convince someone that had walked away from the faith to turn back to Christ in one blog post. Before I post my answer to anonymous' question, I'd like to hear what others would say, help me out and share your thoughts.

Oh, and I updated the article of the week link finally.

Te Deum Laudamus

2006-02-13T21:32:00.000-06:00

You are God, we praise You. You are the Lord, we acclaim You. You are the eternal Father; all creation worships You.
To You all angels, all the powers of heaven, cherubim and seraphim sing in endless praise: “Holy, holy, holy Lord, God of power and might, heaven and earth are full of Your glory.”
The glorious company of apostles praise You. The noble fellowship of prophets praise You. The white-robed army of martyrs praise You.
Throughout the world the holy Church acclaims You, Father of majesty unbounded, Your true and only Son, worthy of all worship, and the Holy Spirit, Advocate and Guide.
Come then, Lord, sustain Your people, bought with the price of Your own blood, and bring us with Your saints to everlasting glory.
Amen.

An Apple a Day...

2006-02-10T15:57:00.000-06:00

by Jessica

IT has finally happened! I am sitting here writing this (when I should be figuring out what I'm making for company tonight) on our new-to-us Mac PowerBook G4! There is real potential here for some "idol" worship, this machine is great and I'm in love. Why I ever left Mac nearly 8 years ago I'll never really know though it had something to do with a free PC...

Still, dreams do come true!

Added later: Did you watch any of the opening ceremony for the Olympics? What in the world was with the music? All really bad American pop from the 80's! Italy acually has beautiful music, why did they pick some of the most terrible music in world history? Ugh!

Hasty Ritual

2006-02-09T11:35:00.000-06:00

by Jeremy Weber

Oh, how hastily we partake of the blood sacrifice of our Savior, how hurriedly we consume the reminder of the incarnation of our God, and of his substitutionary spilt blood. How easy it is to swallow His death: our rightful recompense. What is the hurry? A moment’s reflection is quickly followed by a hasty ritual. With little time to remember, to reflect on meaning, has the meaning faded into a symbol, the action become a symbol of a symbol? Has communing with God been replaced by a purely physical act? Is the sacrament of communion devoid of communion?

I do not intend to point fingers. These thoughts occurred to me while I served communion tonight. This was my first time to assist in the distribution of the elements in a church gathering. Oddly enough, the last time I contributed anything to this blog was related to communion as well (see Surprised by Beauty a while back in the archives). Tonight we heard from a man who has known much suffering as a result of giving his life to Jesus. He was an outcast in his own village and his family, lived off the streets and has seen religious genocide first-hand. Hearing his story, of how his family believed that their ancestors demanded blood sacrifices in order for them to intercede for his family to God, and how, being introduced to Jesus, he easily understood the spilt blood of Jesus as the end of all other blood sacrifices, seemed like a tale of an ancient world, like the stories I’ve read in the Old Testament. And yet, there he stood, in the present, telling us an ancient tale that has taken place within our lifetime. By first grade, he was trained to perform the rituals involving the killing of animals to his ancestors. How real for him was this story of God becoming man, shedding His blood to put an end to empty rituals. How real he made it appear to me as he shared about his life, ripped apart because of his faith in God and somehow transformed into a beautiful new life of meaning, hope, obedience and purpose.

After the speaker had finished sharing his story with us, our pastor led us into a time of silent reflection, broken only by a meaningful responsive liturgy, reminding us of our brokenness. He moved easily into an explanation of the elements of communion, breaking the bread as a reminder of Christ’s brokenness, thereby creating a link between ours and His, suggesting the mystery of how His brokenness mends our lives. He then invited us all to continue in our act of communion with God by taking into ourselves the symbols of Christ’s sacrifice. With a hint of trepidation I took my position, holding the cup, trying to recall the words to say. The first person came up, and after hearing the first set of words, I effortlessly say: “this is the blood of Christ, shed for you.” What an honor, sinner though I am, to hold the symbol of my salvation in my hands, and to share it too. And how appropriate. What grace we are given.

This is when I noticed how quickly people were passing by, how precious few stopped for the teensiest moment before the elements and waited for the words to be uttered, words of significance, reminders of meaning. I cannot judge what was going on in anyone’s heart, but I can share what I observed. To me, there appeared to be a big difference between the meditative moments of communion that preceded and the physical expression of communion.

“This is the body of Christ, broken for you.”

“This is the blood of Christ, shed for you.”

Take time to acknowledge the meaning behind the elements, be attentive to the words spoken to you, the One who gave us everything deserves another second of reflection. Thanks be to God.

Repeat Posting

2006-02-09T10:40:00.000-06:00

I'm behind in my posting- again but I have a really good excuse, I promise. Ok, you may think this a little cheap but I'm going to re-post the very first post we made on this blog 'cause it's better than nothing... Right now I'm recovering from a miscarriage and setting up my new previous but I'll get back on the blogging horse again soon. So here goes the old post:

What's the Point? by Jeremy and Jessica Martin-Weber

With so many different voices out there calling for what true worship should be, I sometimes wonder what we could possibly add to the conversation. It's easy to feel overwhelmed by the sheer material and resources available for and on the subject of worship. And when you try and follow the next big thing in the worship revival, too late you find you're already behind the times and committing the latest worship crime against the church. Last years buzz words are this years cringe points and you're hit full in the face that in some places the worship wars aren't over. In fact, they've either only just begun or just look a little different. So, what's the point?

"1Be careful what you do when you enter the house of God. Some fools go there to offer sacrifices, even though they haven't sinned. But it's best just to listen when you go to worship. 2Don't talk before you think or make promises to God without thinking them through. God is in heaven, and you are on earth, so don't talk too much. 3If you keep thinking about something, you will dream about it. If you talk too much, you will say the wrong thing.4God doesn't like fools. So don't be slow to keep your promises to God. 5It's better not to make a promise at all than to make one and not keep it. 6Don't let your mouth get you in trouble! And don't say to the worship leader, "I didn't mean what I said." God can destroy everything you have worked for, so don't say something that makes God angry. 7Respect and obey God!" Ecclesiastes 5:1-7 (CEV)

As I start up this blog to enter into an already existing conversation I feel that we must first remind ourselves of the point. Why are you here? Is it to learn what the latest trend is? Is it to have your feelings or viewpoints validated? Is it out of a fear of being left out? Is it to escape spending time with God? Is it to feel empowered as you enter into the conversation? To learn more about worship forms, thoughts, ideas or something else? Some of these aren't bad motivations, but to me, it seems that we can talk an awful lot about worship and forget why we're having that conversation in the first place. Any one of those reasons can easily become the whole point. So before we enter into any kind of discussion on music selection, experiential elements, tech solutions, video or sound, worship style, life-style worship, complex worship philosophies, or anything else related to worship, we need to remember that worship is serious business. Before it's anything else, it's a time shared between us and God, individually and collectively. In our excitement to learn and talk about worship, could we be leaving God out of it? Have we made promises to Him that we have neglected? The passage above from Ecclesiastes has some very important cautions that we throw to the wind far too often as we get embroiled in the complexities of this new ipod world. The cautions: Be careful. Keep your promises with God. Shut up. Listen. Obey. Mean what you say. Remember Who you worship. Worship.

What happens when these other reasons, good as they may be, become an end in themselves? What if talking about worship becomes the point? Perhaps we need to consider the first commandment: "You shall have no other gods before me. You shall not make for yourself an idol in the form of anything in heaven above or on the earth beneath or in the waters below. You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I, the LORD your God, am a jealous God" Exodus 20:3-5 (NIV). We must ask ourselves, are we worshiping the Lord our God or are we worshiping worship and therefore ourselves? Have we fallen into a kind of idolatry of worship? In the quest to discover true worship I sometimes fear that we allow talking about, reading about, and thinking about worship to substitute for actual worship. Real worship has nothing to do with worship wars, traditional vs. contemporary, liturgical, non-liturgical, seeker-sensitive, purpose driven, postmodern, emerging or anything else that's likely selling on Amazon right now. All of these topics are worth our consideration but in the midst of impassioned debates we must be very careful to still be worshiping. God has no desire for our philosophy of worship to be sound if we are profoundly lacking in the area of actually worshiping Him. God desires our obedience to Him as our worship, not all that we can learn. It's time for pastors, worship leaders, worship teams and committees, church leaders and indeed all of the body of Christ to ask themselves what it is we are worshiping. When was the last time that you sincerely spent time in worship, time invested to bring glory to God alone. Not time to learn more about worship, not to analyze the latest trend, or to critique someone elses worship but honest-to-goodness poured out and broken worship of the One and only True God. Being up to date on the latest worship trends isn't all that important. Fighting for the traditions of meaningful worship experiences is not the intense battle to be spending all your energy on. Constantly looking for what true worship looks like is no excuse to neglect worshiping our Lord. I look forward to discussing worship but as we begin I want to be sure we don't neglect God's Word and remind ourselves of the point, to worship Him. For some of us it may be time to log off the computer, put down a book, put a conversation on hold, turn off a CD, cease the studies, and worship.

But the time is coming--it has, in fact, come--when what you're called will not matter and where you go to worship will not matter. It's who you are and the way you live that count before God. Your worship must engage your spirit in the pursuit of truth. That's the kind of people the Father is out looking for: those who are simply and honestly themselves before him in their worship. God is sheer being itself--Spirit. Those who worship him must do it out of their very being, their spirits, their true selves, in adoration." John 4:23-24 (The Message)

How High would you bid?

2006-02-01T18:38:00.000-06:00

by Jessica Martin-Weber

You can send an atheist to church- seriously. A guy in Chicago is giving people of any faith from anywhere the opportunity to send him to church be selling his church going self on ebay, go check it out and let me know what you think. I've been following the auction since Monday and find the comments that people are making really amazing actually. Let me know what you think.

Just not a priority

2006-01-16T16:00:00.000-06:00

by Jessica Martin-Weber

I am certain the world of blog has written me off. I suspected that even before I disappeared for months but not blogging for nearly 2 months was probably the equivalent of cement shoes for my blog. Ah well... I've been busy, but who hasn't. There are lots of reasons why I haven't blogged in a while- and I mean, no blogging at all. I haven't been reading blogs, posting blogs, or even thinking about blogs until people have pointed out that I haven't been blogging. If you're asking what happened (if anybody even checks to see if I've added anything) there are lots of reason but it boils down to this: I had more important things to do. My energy and attention was needed elsewhere and when it came down to what energy was left over I didn't want to go near the computer and come up with something to say. No, blogging was not a priority.

It's strange, as our lives started filling up with this, that, and the other I feel like we started hearing a lot about how what we spend our money and our time on says a lot about what is really important to us. Just yesterday in two separate worship gatherings (at very different churches) we were challenged about what does our check book say about us (mine says that I love electricity and gas) and what does our schedule indicate we really worship. What a crappy challenge and one I needed to hear. I have really found myself wondering about these things. During the past few months our time has been eaten up by many things but in particular has been the question of "what next?" I hate being in limbo, hate it. This position of waiting and having no idea what to do drives me crazy. And so I started making that disastrous mistake that often happens when you're stuck waiting: I began to try to make my own way, seeking for what was next instead of keeping my focus on Christ. The last two months has been spent getting my focus back to where it needs to be. This isn't a New Years resolution- I don't make resolutions, this is the kind of thing when you realize you were pretending you had all the answers but you didn't have a clue and one day you realize that you're not going anywhere really because you never found out where you're headed in the first place. It's the time when you stop and listen.

Two days ago I had coffee with the mother of the boy that abused our children- I'm not going to refer to her that way again because she is my friend. The coffee was great, the time even better. Pain and healing is an interesting thing. Most of the time we seek healing and think it means no more pain but healing is painful, therapy is hard, and restoring a relationship that was deeply wounded isn't going to be easy. I miss my friend and her family and I want her back in my life. It will be hard, I know that but it doesn't mean it's not worth it.

I'll be back again soon!

The Pain Closet

2005-11-29T01:16:00.000-06:00

by Jessica Martin-Weber

Sunday morning you walk into church, receive a warm welcome from the greeter opening the door, she hands you a bulletin and you make your way towards the worship center. Just as you’re about to step through the doors another greeter steps up and with another warm and friendly smile puts his arm around you and steers you away from the worship center entrance. You allow him to guide you to a small door wedged between the maintenance closet and the door to the stairs that leads to the balcony. There a small sign whispers “Pain Closet.” The greeter, who has been warmly chatting to you about last nights game on TV lowers his voice and tells you that you need to stop there before entering the worship center. “You don’t want to take anything into worship that will distract you from God now do you?” He pats you on the back with a knowing smile and walks away. You’re a bit surprised you pain was so obvious, you thought you had hidden it well but deep down you know that you want somebody to know it’s there so you’ve gotten sloppy in covering it up. When you open the door to the pain closet directions posted on the inside of the door tell you to pick up two stickers with the same number, apply one to your pain and either fold it and leave it on a shelf or hang it on the rack. The second number goes with you so you can claim your pain following the service. Swallowing your surprise at how many pains are already in there, you dutifully put your pain away after a longing look and fighting the desire to take that pain with you, you return to the worship center for an hour filled of uplifting music, uplifting message, uplifting hand shakes, uplifting fellowship, hoping to leave uplifted. But not before stopping to claim your secret pain that would have gotten in the way. With your pain hidden securely under your coat you leave feeling anything but uplifted since nobody knows your pain and you wonder if sticking it in a closet during worship means God somehow missed that too.

And God created Ugly... Praise be to God!

2005-11-17T09:25:00.000-06:00

If you've never wondered "what was God thinking?" This may just do it for you. Meet Sam, voted the three year champion of the world's ugliest dog contest. Doesn't it just make you want to say... something?

Go this way

2005-10-28T12:06:00.000-05:00

I don't know why the links not working so we're going to do it the old fashioned way:

http://www.reallivepreacher.com/node/613

The face of pain

2005-10-28T11:54:00.000-05:00

by Jessica

I found a beautiful, disturbing essay linked from Maggie Dawn's blog about one person's reaction to pain, particularly a child's deep pain. It really resonated with me and I hope you take the time to read it. Go here to check it out.

In Search of Easy Peace

2005-10-25T09:20:00.000-05:00

by Jessica

Like a River glorious is God's perfect peace,
Over all victorious in it's bright in-crease:
Perfect, yet it floweth fuller every day,
Perfect, yet it groweth deeper all the way.

Stayed upon Jehovah, hearts are fully blest,
Finding as He promised, perfect peace and rest.

Hidden in the Hallow of His blessed hand,
Never foe can follow, never traitor stand;
Not a surge of worry, not a shade of care,
Not a blast of hurry touch the spirit there.

Stayed upon Jehovah, hearts are fully blest,
Finding as He promised, perfect peace and rest.

Every joy or trial falleth from above,
Traced upon our dial by the Sun of Love;
We may trust Him fully all for us to do;
They who trust Him wholly find Him wholly true.

Stayed upon Jehovah, hearts are fully blest,
Finding as He promised, perfect peace and rest.

by Frances R. Havergal

I love this hymn, it's beautiful. This hymn has had a lot of meaning in my life along with hymns such as "It Is Well" and "Jesus Calls Us O'er the Tumult." I love that these hymns unabashedly address the challenge facing Christians of living with pain and struggles. What I think sometimes happens though with these songs and even with some of Scripture is that we begin to believe that our lives with Christ are going to be all peaches and cream by simply "letting it go- giving it to God." What do we do when our lives aren't peaches and cream? What if "letting it go" just gives us more? How do we continue to worship in spite of the pain and challenges we face? Does living for Christ mean an absence of pain? It doesn't take long for most of us to answer "no" to that question but I wonder how many of us live as though we believe God somehow owes us that. The truth is, the peace and hope we have in Christ may not look like the peace and hope we desire for ourselves. God's peace doesn't equal everything going our way to ensure our greatest comfort. No, God's peace exists even in the midst of turmoil and it's a much more subtle experience and we may feel as though it's not what we thought we had signed up for. God's peace, love, mercy, grace, and hope doesn't mean everything is going to be easy. Sin is still a factor in our lives and will be until we are with God and can truly experience "no more pain." Until then we must continue to challenge one another in the Christian community to worship in the face of pain.

Where have we been? Hmmmmm, that's a good question. We've been "around." Busy doing other things: life. Thanks to Ophelia and her teacher we've rediscovered the joy of drawing and painting. Art is often one of those things we don't have time for but we've been making time for it and have remembered how much we love it. Taking time to be creative is important, hope you can find a way to make that happen for you today.

Where do you learn?

2005-09-16T16:09:00.000-05:00

by Jessica

My mom taught me that we should never stop learning, never. Of all the lessons my mother taught me (and there are a lot) that is one that has had great impact on my life and I continue to learn. Where do we learn? That's kind of like asking "where do you worship?" Every where. All the time. Without ceasing.

We have class tonight hanging with some friends at CDG again. I appreciate our teachers at the shelter and look forward to another night of learning.

So where do you learn?

Sunday's lies

2005-09-15T09:53:00.000-05:00

by Jessica

When I was in middle school I remember the music pastor of my church making statement something along the lines of this: "Christians tell more lies while hiding behind a hymnal every Sunday morning than many people do during an entire week." Though I think that may be a bit of an overstatement (and they may lie even more now looking up at a screen...) I believe there is some truth in that. We often sing about what we believe, how committed we are, claim that Jesus is "our everything," and many other profound truths and statements without even considering the implication of making such a bold claim. Sadly, sometimes we are also proclaiming un-truth. There have been great strides made in this area but there is still plenty of room for improvement including educating not only our leaders but also our ministry teams and our congregations. Even just this past Sunday I stopped myself mid phrase in a really cool sounding worship song (musically this piece was great) because I realized that I didn't agree with and therefore couldn't sing those words.

Whether we're lying about what we feel, believe, and promise of ourselves and how we live or are singing false teachings, Scripture says that we are to enter into worship with care:

Ecclesiastes 5
1Guard your steps as you go to the house of God and draw near to listen rather than to offer the sacrifice of fools; for they do not know they are doing evil.
2Do not be hasty in word or impulsive in thought to bring up a matter in the presence of God For God is in heaven and you are on the earth; therefore let your words be few.
3For the dream comes through much effort and the voice of a fool through many words.
4When you make a vow to God, do not be late in paying it; for He takes no delight in fools Pay what you vow!
5It is better that you should not vow than that you should vow and not pay.
6Do not let your speech cause you to sin and do not say in the presence of the messenger of God that it was a mistake. Why should God be angry on account of your voice and destroy the work of your hands?
7For in many dreams and in many words there is emptiness. Rather, fear God.

I was recently asked to share my thoughts on pursuing greater theological depth and breadth in the lyrical content of songs of the church. Here's what I shared:

Very early in my ministry I was challenged by a very traditional older man about some worship lyrics that were very popular at the time and even though I tried to argue with him I couldn't. He was right about the lyrics lacking in theological and doctrinal integrity and I couldn't deny that this seemed to be an alarming trend in many worship lyrics. Since that time as both a worship leader and a song writer I have sought to be a gatekeeper of the content of the worship songs that I share with others. I believe that in order to truly be effective in pursuing this goal the leader must be immersed in the study of Scripture and spending time with the Lord in order to maintain an understanding of what honors Him and to not allow any room for personal integrity to be compromised. My experience in this area has led me to deeper study of Scripture, seeking the counsel of those with more knowledge of doctrine and theology, and leading the process of weeding out inappropriate or weak songs, congregational readings, dramas, and other worship expressions in the worship repertoire or liturgy and replacing them with worship expressions more honoring to God and edifying of the Body. I believe it is a very serious sin if we allow people to inadvertently learn false teaching because we like the way something sounds or are too lazy to pursue the necessary steps of insuring the integrity of our worship.

A casual worship style shouldn't mean a casual approach to worship. Great care and attention should be given to how we invite others to participate and the tolls we give them to do so. As leaders, we are responsible for teaching truth first, not just using something that's cool. Encourage people to think about what they're singing or hearing and to be willing to challenge it in their personal lives. As worshipers we need to participate in worship through music and other expressions as though it's more than just the "warm-up" to the message. This is serious stuff, the promises you make before God, even the ones in the songs, are real and coming with humility and asking God to search your heart is an important part of our worship.

6Do not let your speech cause you to sin and do not say in the presence of the messenger of God that it was a mistake.

Tired

2005-09-10T12:50:00.000-05:00

by Jessica

Last night was so awesome. We're all really tired now but looking forward to when we can go back and hang with some really great people. The girls didn't want to leave this morning when we told them it was time for us to go and wanted to know when we could go back. That's pretty cool.

2005-09-09T09:22:00.000-05:00

by Jessica

Our very good friend, Steve, leaves for Scotland today. Steve takes at least partial credit for introducing Jeremy and I. Lucky guy will be going to the University of Edinburgh to study Theological Ethics with an emphasis in media and theological ethics and specializing in theology and film. When it's all said and done, he'll have a PhD in Theology. Sounds like so much fun. Steve and Jeremy and I spent hours and hours discussing Scripture, theology, doctrine, the church, worship and the Gospel in the arts back in college and then when Jeremy and I were first married. Steve regularly kicks me in the rear and challenges me in my relationships with Christ and others. Thanks to the internet we won't really miss him, we haven't lived near each other in years but have kept our relationship going via email and instant messaging. I can't wait to discuss with him all the great stuff he'll be studying and how cool will it be to have to watch movie for home work? Have a great trip Steve.

He's "big enough"

2005-09-08T09:08:00.000-05:00

by Jessica

Broken heart I try to hide
I need You to see me
Sweep away the shards of pain
Your beauty in me revealing

I'm afraid You won't hear me when I call
my God, my Salvation
Will You be near me when I fall?
my God, my Salvation
And if Your praises cease on my lips
Will you still call me Your own?

My God, why have You forsaken me?
Hear my cry I pray!
My God, as surely as You give
You have taken away
my God, my Salvation

A true heart to You I bring
You vanquished all pretending
Creator King of all of me
From this pain bring beauty freeing

I'm afraid You won't hear me when I call
my God, my Salvation
Will You be near me when I fall?
my God, my Salvation
And if Your praises cease on my lips
Will you still call me Your own?

My God, why have You forsaken me?
Hear my cry I pray!
My God, as surely as You give
You have taken away
my God, my Salvation

Yesterday, today and tomorrow
You are still the same
In the midst of the joy
Or the agonizing pain

Friday evenings are family night at our house and tomorrow night our family is staying at a local mission-turned shelter to give the operators there a break and a chance to be home with their family for an evening. We feel blessed to get to spend some time with the evacuees, it's going to be a great family night we can hardly wait. The above lyrics came out of a time of frustration in my personal life and are a little bit of Psalm 25, and Job 1 combined with a desire for authenticity in my worship. Thoughts such as those above are ones we are trying to keep in mind as we serve and pray for the evacuees and trying to stay away from telling them how to feel as they go through this. It's ok, God can handle it and can even be honored as we struggle with pain. I am glad He's "big enough."

The Evangelical Pope

2005-09-07T10:30:00.000-05:00

by Jessica

So I'm a little frustrated. Rick Warren was on Good Morning America today speaking on behalf of all pastors, at least evangelical ones, and I was struck with the notion that Rick Warren is kind of perceived as the pope of evangelicalism. Jeremy had the same thought before I even verbalized it. Warren came to Houston yesterday to meet with pastors to tell them how to minister to the evacuees of Katrina particularly in understanding that they're going to need long term help not just emergency assistance. I think all of Houston has realized this but hey, a reminder from a guy from a wealthy California suburban megachurch can't hurt. Sorry, sorry, a little bit of sarcasm coming through there. Warren has had an impact on my life and the ministry I'm called to but there is something about all the "purpose-driven" propaganda I'm having a hard time with. Maybe it's the trademark. But honestly, I've tried to "get it" and I just don't.

In the August 22 issue of TIME Magazine there was an article titled: Warren of Rwanda- The best-selling megapastor wants to turn the genocide site into the first "purpose-driven nation." I'm glad he's helping Rwanda, there's not been enough help there as it is but why does it somehow seem... wrong. Not the help, help is good but that it's somehow about Warren himself, about his "purpose-driven" trademark? I don't really believe that's his intention or at least not his primary one, but it is a great marketing strategy. I'm not sure I understand what his goal is in this either. Does having the first "purpose-driven" nation mean the same thing as having a Christian nation? Is that even what we should be going for? In the entire article there isn't one mention of sharing the Gospel, of course, this is TIME we're talking about, but still, shouldn't that be a verbalized part of Warren's plan- even to the general public? I guess in the end what I'm asking is does this have to be some kind of "purpose-driven" campaign for the evangelical church to finally get involved? There have been independent mission organizations and relief efforts going on there for a long time and ignored by at least the American evangelical church, why suddenly this?

There's been some great ministry through Warren, his church, and his books/programs, I don't want to devalue that at all. I just need to say that whether you call it "purpose-driven," "being Jesus with skin on," "a social Gospel," or "a lifestyle of worship," we are called to serve and love others as Christ- no trademark required. For me, my favorite images from the Katrina aftermath weren't those of President Bush, Rick Warren or any other recognizable figure participating in photo ops with the storm evacuees but those of regular people, small churches, unknown pastors, and neighborhoods serving as unto Christ. That's awesome.

Crazy

2005-09-06T11:49:00.000-05:00

by Jessica

This past week has passed in a blur and I've been sick and exhausted.

Last week, in the midst of the immediate (which lasted for a while) aftermath of Katrina I heard a few sentiments expressed regarding the chance to rebuild New Orleans now "without all the sin." I even heard a few people hint at this being the punishment or "God's way of dealing" for New Orleans. I must admit to a laugh out loud when I saw that Burbon Street and the area around it has made it through quite well actually- oh the irony. But what do you think? Do you think it's possible that God sent this storm to take care of New Orleans because of the city's reputation for sin? If you do, how do you explain the number of areas devastated by Hurricane Katrina that could be described as just the opposite of New Orleans if nothing else? And then, how does this impact the churches response to the needs that have arisen as a result of the storm and the devastation she left?

And I'm still planning on posting on worship in the midst of pain- seems even more appropriate now. Yesterday I had the privalidge to serve in an area shelter and hear some of the stories. If you haven't spent any time with the evacuees, you need to know that these people are amazing. I'm looking forward to spending more time with them and helping however I can this week- I'll be volunteering at the Relient Center. I'll post as I can but for now let me just say that I've been convicted and challenged by their response. Wow.

That's My Man

2005-08-26T15:51:00.000-05:00

by Jessica

My love is mine, and I am his.

My dear lover glows with health-
red-blooded, radiant!
He's one in a million.
There's no one quite like him!

His words are kisses, his kisses are words.
Everything about him delights me, thrills me
through and through!

That's my lover, that's my man.

Song of Songs 2:16a, 5:10 & 16-17

Tomorrow, Saturday, August 27th, 2005 is 9 years. His gift to me? Replacing the lost diamond from my wedding ring (no engagement ring) and having all of the gold prongs replaced on all three settings so I don't loose another diamond again. I love my ring. I've been without it for nearly 5 years because of loosing the diamonds. It has a story and we only know 9 years of it's story. Unique and unlike any other we've seen, we bought it in a pawn shop on Chicago Avenue and it's most likely a man's ring from around 1910- the gold is very soft (18K- thus loosing the diamonds, the prongs are now 14K) but very thick with intricate detailing. The Beautiful Ring. Jeremy's ring is also an unusual antique and our rings suit us well.

"This ring is meant to be a reminder of my unending love for you." -Jessica and Jeremy to one another on December 28, 1998 when we exchanged rings 4 months after we eloped in Chicago.

I love you Jeremy. I am the best version of myself when I am with you. You've given me strength, hope and courage beyond my wildest dreams. Thank you for being a Godly man. I've loved worshiping the One True Lord with you for the past 9 years. Even though I know I could live without you and that God's strength is exactly what I need, I would never choose to be without you. Though we were very young when we got married, I don't regret it for a moment and I'd do it all over again. Thank you for your love, I look forward to many more years to come. Happy Anniversary.

Everyone else- sorry. Please excuse me while I celebrate my husband and our marriage. I won't be so mushy next time. but gosh, I do love him.

Child Express

2005-08-25T18:20:00.000-05:00

by Jessica

Child of Children
Dance, sing, laugh, cry
Child express;
Fidget restless, silent, still
Child express;
Babble, distracted, sleepy, sigh
Child express;
Color, create, whisper, learn
Child express;
All ages united in Abba love
Express themselves together to the One above
Child express;
Child-Parent model, child-spectator patient, learn together
Child express;
Celebrate
Barriers broken
Inhibitions freed
To the One who gaves us these
God worshipped.

Barney, Big Bird, Bob the Tomato and Jesus

2005-08-22T10:26:00.000-05:00

by Jessica

Yesterday Jeremy and I were worshiping at a church without our girls (we were out of state for the weekend) and while the worship time was great and the message was really great (you’ll hear more about that one later, it reminded me again of wanting to blog on worship in the face of pain- I got back to work on that on the plane coming home last night but it’s going to have to wait as it’s turning into a whole message or article) there were two other things I noticed about the gathering. One was obvious, the lack of our children and the strange feeling that gave me and the other was the row in front of us. There, in the row in front of us yesterday morning we saw something very special. I don’t know if the people realized they were living out Christ’s commands to let the little children come to Him but they were. A young child was in this row and here’s the cool part: I couldn’t tell you who his mother or father was. Everyone around took part in involving that child in the worship. The thing that stood out to me was that the parents were not alone and, I learned latter, while the grandparents were there as well there were people helping that had not blood relation to the child. In helping with the child in the worship gathering the people in the church sent a strong message to those parents and even to me: we value you and your children as God does and though we may not be family we are in Christ and we’re in this together. You should know, it wasn’t distracting, I don’t know if anyone else even noticed maybe because this is just what they do and it’s a part of the culture there or because it really wasn’t distracting and I was given a glimpse into this beautiful picture because it’s been a subject near to my heart lately.

Our very good friends, Tom and Laura understand this. This couple love God, love to worship, love to study His Word and love children and want to help teach them to do the same. They have exemplified in so many ways what this can look like and in doing so have taught Jeremy and I a lot about love. Laura is a 1-3 grade Montessori teacher and understands the way children learn (I often call her for advice!) and has this unbelievable nack of getting a child to quietly interact in a way that suits their learning without being too much of a distraction to those around them. The gentleness and patience this couple shows toward children (our children have often sat with them when Jeremy and I were leading worship- and usually they’d rather stay with Tom and Laura during the message because of their understanding of how to involve children) helps the parents and children not only feel valued but encourages them to connect with God as a family. Tom and Laura are older than Jeremy and I, their children grown, are grandparents 3 times over,and yet they haven’t stopped teaching, loving and being involved in the lives of children in the church. They don’t teach children’s Sunday School and they don’t volunteer in the nursery, they model behavior of living worship and teach children and the parents of children to do the same. The older teaching the younger. The family of God being the family of God. I believe this is very much what Christ wants to see.

Sadly, this isn’t always the case. I know parents that have given up going to church because this isn’t demonstrated. I’ve heard everything: they can’t bear the looks of others towards them and their “unruly” children (oddly enough, the rest of the week they seem like OK kids), they can’t stop their children from being kids, they don’t get anything out of the gathering times anyway and neither do their kids or anyone else around them, because every time they put their child in the nursery they get sick, because the child screams when being left for Sunday School, because they don’t have enough time as a family as it is and church feels like anything but time together as a family, because the service times conflict with nap time and no matter what, their child is going to have a tough time, because they just don’t have the energy to do it any more, and because they feel all alone. The parents that do stick it out, specially the single ones, are amazing, yes, (and probably from a very churched background) but how long do we say that parents have had to struggle with this for years and have managed, why can’t they? We are willing to re-evaluate our worship styles, our teaching styles, our small group ministries, and so much more including how to make the children’s programs cool but we aren’t willing to say “this isn’t good enough?” Churches all over love to say that they want to be a “New Testament Church” or modeled after the “Early Church” but not much has been done to understand how that would effect the way we minister and involve our children. I seriously doubt that in the days of secret church meetings children were sent into another part of the catacombs or house during the time of gathering together- parents couldn’t take that risk. (I have no proof of this and haven't studied it at all it's really just a hunch based on what little I do know about families in that time and the culture of the early church- I'll have to do more research.) So what would this look like and how can we apply it to today or should we even? It seems most of us agree that the Easter Morning breakfast isn’t the right tool to teach service (THANK YOU!) but what about worship? The question about appropriate age is a struggle. Personally, I have a problem with saying that my child needs to be able to sit still long enough first- if that’s the case, she’ll know her ABC’s before she’s really learned anything about God and worshiping Him with God’s people. I really would hate for my child to have a closer relationship with Barney, Big Bird, and Bob the Tomato than with Christ because they’re not old enough for Him yet.

By the way, I didn't just miss our girls yesterday, I missed worshiping with them.

Walking Lessons

2005-08-17T12:11:00.000-05:00

by Jessica Martin-Weber

I had planned that my next post would be on worship in the face of pain but I've gone in a different direction for the moment. Maybe next time...

Recently I was involved in a conversation regarding the place of children in a worship gathering which ranged from those that were annoyed with children in a worship setting (not always behaving to adult standards) to those that were annoyed that the others were annoyed with children in the worship setting (who are we to kick kids out of church and who said adults actually behave in worship anyway?) and then that led to a brief and vague discussion of “what is a worship setting?” which I quickly abandoned (Romans 12:1-3). Following that conversation came one concerning the place of youth in worship and then eventually the place of youth in the church which then led to the question: is the place of children and youth in the worship gathering tied to the churches view of the place of these two groups in our churches? To which I found myself asking: what does Scripture have to say about this? (Check out Matt. 18:1-7; Matt. 19:12-15; Matt 21:15-17; Eph. 6:1-4; Titus 2:3-5; 1 John 3:18; 2 John 1:4- I want someone to write this to me some day; these are just a few, there are many, many more in both the old and new testaments.)

When it comes to the issue of rearing our children as followers of Christ, I believe we are all too often asking the wrong questions first and never do get around to the right questions. Nobody would really argue that the parents (Christian ones anyway) are ultimately responsible for the faith education of their children but I would have to argue that we rarely hold them accountable to that beyond the occasional “parenting sermon series” and the annual pat on the back at Sunday School promotion (great job parents- you sent your kids to Sunday School!) or summer camp presentation. So the questions we ask end up being along the lines of age appropriate material, fun factor, cool factor, program comparison, and over-all marketable concepts that, sadly, end up taking all the responsibility off the parents shoulders- or so it can seem. I have heard it argued that we can’t trust the parents to teach their children correct doctrine and I wonder if the church would have to be so worried about this if they were truly teaching the Scriptures to the adults.

So why do we feel we need to separate our youth and our children (a distinction that is unique to just the past 80 years) from the adults during times of congregational worship and Bible Study? I’m right up there with the parents that appreciate the opportunity to listen to a sermon that is on an adult level without the distraction of my children or to make it through a worship gathering without a rushed trip to the potty with our two year old, but if I’m honest the bigger distraction is trying to keep my children from being a distraction to others- I guess I’m used to tuning out my children. But I regularly find myself questioning the practice of complete generational segregation. In many churches we find “children’s church,” “children’s Sunday School,” “children’s choir, “children’s midweek activity,” “youth group,” “youth Bible Study,” “youth choir,” “youth worship” and a host of other generation segregating activities and then we’re shocked when the generations coming of age feel like they don’t belong or there’s no place for them. By the time a child brought up in the church reaches adulthood they have been fed the idea that there is something specifically for them that will meet all of their needs, wants, and desires for a place to connect with God. Upon graduating from high school they discover that they are now supposed to like the same style of worship, Bible study and everything else that appeals to their parents taste. While I’m sure that many churches make sure their children are taught sound doctrine there are often holes in the child’s understanding of this doctrine, a lack of personal responsibility for their spiritual growth, a disconnect from their family, and a very selfish approach to understanding their role within the congregation and community. Today’s youth have a more pressing urge to see social reform but have no idea how this fits with the Gospel, themselves, or the church and they view the church as being there for them, to meet their needs. The older generations and church leaders are concerned that the younger generations are leaving the church and while I see that there are many factors contributing to this plight I believe the church must ask itself how they abandoned teaching the parents to teach their children in the first place and how to reverse this.

I do believe there is a place for generation specific ministries, particularly in the lives of children without Christian parents but I fear the church has taken it too far. How do the younger learn from the older when we remove them to be with a few adults that have the “gift” of children’s/youth ministry? How are our children encouraged to honor and obey their parents in a setting that removes the parents most of the time? How are fathers and mothers held accountable to love their children and to personally take responsibility for teaching their children?

Most of the very important life lessons a child learns aren’t learned from a textbook or a curriculum, they are taught by observing and participating. Walking isn’t taught by a manual but by a child seeing everyone else walk around them and then by being encouraged in a loving environment to try to do the same even sometimes being allowed to fall. So it is in learning to walk in faith. We want our children to follow Christ? Then parents and leaders need to follow Christ. Want our children to live lives of worship? Then we need to live lives of worship. Will our children grow to love God’s Word and hide it in their hearts? They will if they see us do the same. Do we want our children to grow into adults that love and serve God’s people and minister to the less fortunate? Well then get off your rear ends and take your children with you to serve His people and minister to the less fortunate. This is the faith education that parents and the church is called to! It's living, it's real and it's hard.

It would be wonderful to see the church value children beyond the instant numbers boost they can be by truly inviting them into worship, Bible studies, ministry and service opportunities (for the record, having the youth serve the Easter breakfast as a fund raiser doesn’t really count) and by coming along side parents in teaching the children and being more than a babysitting service getting children and youth out of the way of “real church.” If we want them to learn it then we need live it and allow them to participate with us. I know I’m not offering any real solutions to this problem but I hope it’s a place to begin the conversation and we would challenge all Christian adults to live lives of worship so that even the youngest of God’s children see Him reflected in us.

Worship Lessons

2005-07-30T11:56:00.000-05:00

by Jessica Martin-Weber

I have said before that my daughters are my heroes but have I mentioned that they are also some of the best teachers I’ve ever had the honor of learning from? Every day I am astonished by the lessons they teach me, I am so blessed.

The case is closed. Nearly a year later the boy that had been sexually abusing our two oldest daughters pled guilty and began serving his sentence last week. This week is the year anniversary of when we learned of the abuse. The emotional and psychological damage became apparent in Ophelia, our eldest as she started kindergarten last fall. She struggled socially and emotionally such that we didn’t recognize our daughter. I will always remember the first week I led worship after rwe learned of the abuse and the months following. My heart was breaking; I was angry, hurt, and desperate. My daughter needed help that I knew I could only partially give. Therapy was a part of that and certainly a step in the right direction for all of us but we knew Ophelia and Lavinia would need more. And I wasn’t sure I could worship with all my heart. But God assured me over time that He would take my broken heart and while I worshiped from my desperate state He would bring healing not only to my heart but to the girls’ as well. A few days ago we got glimpse of how our worship is not meant to be dependent on our emotional state. We had shared with the girls what the boy’s sentence was and what was being done to keep the girls safe from him. This brought up some of the fears and pain from a year ago but as we watched our girls handle this all over again we saw something breathtaking. In a small worship gathering we were leading in a conservative congregation, I looked up towards the girls to check on how they were behaving without a parental presence right next to them and was surprised by a simple beauty. Ophelia in a simple, unassuming posture of worship with her eyes closed, head bowed, and the only one with her hands upraised as she sang “here I am to worship.” My six year old daughter has taught me the importance of worshipping in the face of pain.

For the next few posts I want to talk about worship in the face of pain. If you have a related story, I’d like to hear it. Jeremy and I are praying about this area and how we can use Scripture and our experience in understanding the relationship of pain and worship and your experiences may help us in this process. I'm looking forward to hearing from you.

2005-07-28T14:42:00.000-05:00

The Neverending Story

2005-07-28T14:23:00.000-05:00

by Jessica Martin-Weber

The Neverending Story, a classic. Not exactly on the same level as, say, the Wizard of Oz, which we also watched this week, but still wonderful and a personal favorite. We've had a blast this summer sharing some of our favorite movies from when we were growing up with the girls: Herbie, The Karate Kid, The Neverending Story, and The Wizard of Oz and we're not done yet. But The Neverending Story is one of my favorites, bad effects and all (hey for an 80's kids movie they were really pretty good). It's just a great movie!

A little bit of light reading.

2005-07-25T19:50:00.000-05:00

Over the past few days Jeremy and I've enjoyed exploring various church websites and reading about what God is doing across the country and world. It's always interesting to discover what God is doing, what churches think of themselves, and how they present themselves on their sites. I'm starting to notice a trend among church websites: most of them stink. Well, not stink but they aren't very atractive or user friendly, just too difficult to use and for the most part they aren't really intended for anyone that, well, doesn't already go to that church. Aside from all of that though, we've had a blast. It's just great to see all the fantastic missions, activities and ministries going on around the world today and we learn a lot. Today we came across a very powerful document on Integral Mission by Keith Zafren the lead pastor of The River Community Church in collaboration with the Leadership Team, advisory council and the staff of The River Community Church that had a most interesting quote by Tom Sine that led me to an article Tom Sine wrote in 1996. Here's just a sample:

"What is our life direction before we become believers? Upward mobility. What is it afterwards? Exactly the same. The only thing that has changed is that we are told in too many of our churches that God is there to help us to get up the mountain a little quicker - instead of us being part of what God is doing to bring righteousness, justice and peace to the earth.
Those of us in evangelical/charismatic and Pentecostal churches throughout the Western world are responsible for selling our young people the wrong dream. For all the talk about the Lordship of Jesus, we have sold them the Western dream with a little Jesus overlay. And it is a dream that is no longer accessible to them."

There were some very interesting ideas presented on these web pages, I'd love you hear your thoughts.

jmw

Running to Worship?

2005-06-04T15:26:00.000-05:00

by Jessica

Jeremy and I have started running. It's great. Really. It's bringing me closer to God because while I run I pray. It goes something like this: "Dear God, make it stop! Help me, I'm dying! Everything hurts; moving, breathing, thinking, my side, my legs, EVERYTHING! HELP ME PLEASE! If I live through this, I promise... to run again tomorrow..."

People do this for fun?! Come on, it's torture. If I were in George Orwell's 1984 my secret deep fear would be having to run for my life or worse, run a marathon. "They" tell me it will get better, gotta keep it up. Well, I'm keeping it up and so far it's still hard but I know that I need to keep going for Jeremy and the girls, they deserve me taking care of myself. So I will keep running.

All this torturous running has had me thinking about worship as a lifestyle. Here is an area where I could use some improvement. I'm hardly worshiping, in fact, I'm always about 2 steps away from cursing up a storm and giving God a piece of my mind on the importance of keeping healthy. Ah yes, my flesh has a thing or two to say about the pain it has to go through. So do you think Paul really meant it when he wrote in Romans 12 "So here's what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life--your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life--and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him." That's from The Message, I just love how Peterson puts it, I can't gloss over it quite as easily as I can with the version I memorized: "Therefore I urge you, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship." (NASV) Do you think Paul could even mean when we're running or doing something else we really hate... dis-like, hate's a bad word in our house. But seriously, God Doesn't expect me to actully worship while I'm out there dying, er, uh, running? What are your thoughts?

Unexpected Beauty

2005-06-04T15:23:00.000-05:00

By Jeremy Martin-Weber

When was the last time that you witnessed something so beautiful that it brought tears to your eyes? For me, it was the other night at worship and it took me totally by surprise. My family and I were worshipping at Ecclesia and there was really nothing extraordinary about the evening. Just like any other worship experience with a young family it was filled with the typical distractions: young kids (our own) with SSD (Sitting Still Disorder) who climb on you, clap out of rhythm, dance without inhibition, are always hungry, and say a loud “Amen” when everyone else is keeping their acquiescence to themselves (kids are such an amazing mix of inspiration and distraction, frustrating you one minute and humbling you the next). A tumultuous nursery drop-off experience with our two year old caused me to miss a chunk of the worship and left me disconnected through the sermon, which led right into communion.

Ecclesia has a come when you’re ready approach to communion where the partakers walk to the front to receive the elements. I like the no-pressure atmosphere, the take the time you need attitude. So, while Jessica was writing in her journal, I tried to focus on God, and why I’m here. I tried to open myself up to Him, to let go of distractions. I like that the speaker utters no words of caution or judgment, trusting that this is a time between you and God, and yet speaks with reverence. The deacons come up to the center to pick up the elements and one of them catches my eye. At first it’s because from the back, he looks like he could be the twin of one of the band members. But then I see that their faces are nothing alike when he turns around. I start to wonder what it is that resonates with me about the way Ecclesia approaches worship. The music is haunting, sorrowful, but the lyrics are hopeful. And I realize it’s the layers, the juxtaposition of opposing realities. It’s because the music is sorrowful that I have the freedom to be real. The music doesn’t pretend to match the hope or joy of the lyrics. This is the same tension that I live with everyday. Life is hard, full of struggles, sorrows, dissonance, and in that I yearn for the joy, the hope, the comfort, the love that I can only find in God. And it goes both ways: I have a life fulfilled in God, in His grace, His love, and yet I am haunted by the harsh reality of the life that I live on earth.

As I let this mix of reality and hope wash over me, my eyes keep being drawn back to that deacon, now holding half a loaf of bread in each hand. As I watch him offer the bread to person after person, saying this is the body of our lord Jesus Christ, I am awe-struck with another layer. This man is smiling to each person as they draw near to him. In the reverence of this moment, he is offering up the kind of welcoming smile that you reserve for a good friend that you haven’t seen in a long time. His smile was telling me that there was nothing in the world he’d rather be doing than what he’s doing and no one he’d rather share this with than the person he’s looking at. His smile would fade a bit after each person passed him by, only to reappear just as genuine as before for the next person, as if it hadn’t been there a second ago. Each moment fresh, each smile new, the love and acceptance of our Lord as He invites us to fellowship with Him written all over his face. I wondered if it was just that he really knew all those people that well, but when I walked up to him, this man I’ve never met, he offered to me the body of Christ with such a loving, welcoming smile, I realized that this love is why I was coming to communion in the first place. Not just to remember a sacrifice, but to embrace the love that led to such a sacrifice. In those moments, in that mix of sorrow and hope, the beautiful thing that brought tears to my eyes was love, the one thing that makes all the contradictions, all the dualities, all the juxtaposed realities possible to bear; the one reality that encompasses them all, envelops them, and surpasses them; love. By the way, the deacon that served me communion that evening was introduced at the end of the service as a brand new staff member that had just moved to Houston from out of town; he’d never seen most of those people before.

"Let me give you a new command: Love one another. In the same way I loved you, you love one another. This is how everyone will recognize that you are my disciples--when they see the love you have for each other." John 13:34-35 (The Message)

Comments Enabled

2005-06-02T21:38:00.000-05:00

by Jessica

I don't know why they weren't working, but comments should be enabled now. Somebody please try it so we can find out! Thanks!

My Need- A Confession

2005-04-25T08:42:00.000-05:00

By Jessica Martin-Weber

Stifled wind, breath pulled sharp
Shattered mirror, broken heart
Before you now I admit my need
The need for freedom from things unseen

Unseen the deeds I can’t atone
The secret lies I’ve lived alone
The bitter thought-gall in my head
A poison from which I should be dead

Broken masques aside me lay
A price beyond what I could pay
Wash the stench of my pretend
And bring my charade to its final end

Harness now to two rough woods
What too long I have kept under hoods
Iron pierce through all the lies
Bring peace and strength to my true inside

Calm the air, breath complete
Full my heart sits at your feet
Deep the pools in which I see
Your love reflecting a brand new me

What's the Point?

2005-04-20T18:19:00.000-05:00

by Jessica and Jeremy Martin-Weber

With so many different voices out there calling for what “true worship” should be, I sometimes wonder what we could possibly add to the conversation. It’s easy to feel overwhelmed by the sheer material and resources available for and on the subject of worship. And when you try and follow the next big thing in the worship revival, too late you find you’re already behind the times and committing the latest worship crime against the church. Last year’s buzz words are this year’s cringe points and you’re hit full in the face that in some places the “worship wars” aren’t over. In fact, they’ve either only just begun or just look a little different. So, what’s the point?

"1Be careful what you do when you enter the house of God. Some fools go there to offer sacrifices, even though they haven't sinned. But it's best just to listen when you go to worship. 2Don't talk before you think or make promises to God without thinking them through. God is in heaven, and you are on earth, so don't talk too much. 3If you keep thinking about something, you will dream about it. If you talk too much, you will say the wrong thing.
4God doesn't like fools. So don't be slow to keep your promises to God. 5It's better not to make a promise at all than to make one and not keep it. 6Don't let your mouth get you in trouble! And don't say to the worship leader, "I didn't mean what I said." God can destroy everything you have worked for, so don't say something that makes God angry. 7Respect and obey God!" Ecclesiastes 5:1-7 (CEV)

As I start up this blog to enter into an already existing conversation I feel that we must first remind ourselves of the point. Why are you here? Is it to learn what the latest trend is? Is it to have your feelings or viewpoints validated? Is it out of a fear of being left out? Is it to escape spending time with God? Is it to feel empowered as you enter into the conversation? To learn more about worship forms, thoughts, ideas or something else? Some of these aren’t bad motivations, but to me, it seems that we can talk an awful lot about worship and forget why we’re having that conversation in the first place. Any one of those reasons can easily become the whole point. So before we enter into any kind of discussion on music selection, experiential elements, tech solutions, video or sound, worship style, life-style worship, complex worship philosophies, or anything else related to worship, we need to remember that worship is serious business. Before it’s anything else, it’s a time shared between us and God, individually and collectively. In our excitement to learn and talk about worship, could we be leaving God out of it? Have we made promises to Him that we have neglected? The passage above from Ecclesiastes has some very important cautions that we throw to the wind far too often as we get embroiled in the complexities of this new ipod world. The cautions: Be careful. Keep your promises with God. Shut up. Listen. Obey. Mean what you say. Remember Who you worship. Worship.

What happens when these other reasons, good as they may be, become an end in themselves? What if talking about worship becomes the point? Perhaps we need to consider the first commandment: "You shall have no other gods before me. You shall not make for yourself an idol in the form of anything in heaven above or on the earth beneath or in the waters below. You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I, the LORD your God, am a jealous God…" Exodus 20:3-5 (NIV). We must ask ourselves, are we worshiping the Lord our God or are we worshiping worship and therefore ourselves? Have we fallen into a kind of idolatry of worship? In the quest to discover “true worship” I sometimes fear that we allow talking about, reading about, and thinking about worship to substitute for actual worship. Real worship has nothing to do with worship wars, traditional vs. contemporary, liturgical, non-liturgical, seeker-sensitive, purpose driven, postmodern, emerging or anything else that’s likely selling on Amazon right now. All of these topics are worth our consideration but in the midst of impassioned debates we must be very careful to still be worshiping. God has no desire for our philosophy of worship to be “sound” if we are profoundly lacking in the area of actually worshiping Him. God desires our obedience to Him as our worship, not all that we can learn. It’s time for pastors, worship leaders, worship teams and committees, church leaders and indeed all of the body of Christ to ask themselves what it is we are worshiping. When was the last time that you sincerely spent time in worship, time invested to bring glory to God alone. Not time to learn more about worship, not to analyze the latest trend, or to critique someone else’s worship but honest-to-goodness poured out and broken worship of the One and only True God. Being up to date on the latest worship trends isn’t all that important. Fighting for the traditions of meaningful worship experiences is not the intense battle to be spending all your energy on. Constantly looking for what “true worship” looks like is no excuse to neglect worshiping our Lord. I look forward to discussing worship but as we begin I want to be sure we don’t neglect God’s Word and remind ourselves of the point, to worship Him. For some of us it may be time to log off the computer, put down a book, put a conversation on hold, turn off a CD, cease the studies, and worship.